Running Updates- Week 2

This is way harder than I imagined.


I've always gone up and down with my fitness levels.  Sometimes I won't work out for a few weeks, and then I start back training for a race.  Post-race I'll take a few weeks off, then I struggle to get back to that level of fitness.  My health has been a cyclical thing for a while; I work out less when I'm extrememly happy in my personal life because I want to spend the majority of my time with family and friends.  When I'm unhappy or irritated with people, I work out more because I use that time to be alone.  I had always thought that my life would follow that pattern forever.  Not so. 

29 April I received a call that my most recent ex-boyfriend was in the hospital following a car accident.  Carly called me. "It's pretty bad. I think you'd better come home."  Within an hour, I had tickets booked and my bag was packed.  I had been in contact with my mom and she was going to pick me up at LGA and bring me right to the hospital.  She called right before I headed to the airport.  I thought she was checking in to make sure I had a ride and I wouldn't be driving.  I rambled on about my suitcase and my ride for minutes before I realized she wasn't responding.  "Honey, he's gone."  Those word knocked the wind out of me.  I had so much I had left to say to him.  He had made me happy for years and then made me so mad.  How would I never be able to get clarification on so many things?  How was I going to have to live the rest of my life with uncertainty.  He thought we were going to get back together; now I would never know.  People in my life were confident that he was my true match in life.  I would never get the chance to explore that.  I would never get to text him another car question or have him send me a text with a picture of some gross meat concoction (knowing full well I don't eat meat anymore.)  He was someone who was closest to me for three and a half years; now there is no one who knows that August 2007-February 2011 part of my life.  It's hard not to believe you've missed your chance when people treat you like a widow and you're hurting so, so much.

The two months after the accident and funeral were the worst of my life.  I was unable to focus on anything but the immediate pain in my life.  Then I met Joel.  I had no intention of looking for someone when I was so broken.  I was barely making it to work on time and my hair was not looking good.  I was hanging out with girlfriends but I had a morbid sense of humor and no one could relate to me.  My girlfriend Angela had flown in from Texas because she was worried about me and we decided to make our way to the bar that Friday night.  I hadn't been to the bar since before the accident and I was not sure I was prepared for binge drinking, sloppy dancing, and men.  Lots of men who would hit on me and remind me all over again that I had an uncertain future.  I remember standing at the bar as my girlfriends took Jello shots.  I was pouting and watching some SC baseball on the tv behind the bar.  Mckinlaye tapped me on the shoulder.  "Lauren, this is Joel." 

I can't believe that one night changed my entire life.  It was exactly 8 weeks after the accident and I still wasn't sure who I was or in what I believed.  Instead of hitting on me, we talked about baseball, our families, education.  [If you've ever been to the Woody, you know how hard it is to talk in there!] I will admit that I did break out some of the signature Lauren dance moves, but I would like to think that taking months off of drinking contributed to that.  Not my finest, but Joel wanted to hang out the next day. And that night. And all Sunday.  We went on our first solo date that Tuesday.  (Remember that Angela had been with us the entire weekend.)  At the end of that date, I knew. I knew he was special and wonderful and that he would be the one to bring me back .   He knew nothing of the accident so he wasn't treating me with kidgloves.  He actually is so caring and thoughtful and loving because that's who he is.  By Sunday evening, Angela was already talking about our future wedding.  It wasn't infatuation or lust or anything superficial; this was a deeper understanding that someone brought him to me because he's everything I've ever wanted.  I wasn't ready for him months ago.  I was on 22 June 2012. 

Joel and I

Now that I finally have my emotional health back on track, it's time to focus on my physical health.  In the past 4.5 months, I've done no running and have eaten way too many grilled cheeses.  (If you want to know how many grilled cheeses are too many, consider that I'm lactose intolerant. Ouch.) 

So I signed up for the Disney Princess Half Marathon with my girlfriend Alex.  Mentally, we are SO ready for this!  Physically, she's a little ready.  Me?  I'm a disaster.  I'm in my second week of half marathon training and two miles hurts.  It hurts so much that sometimes I want to believe that I'm having a heart attack rather than I'm just so out of shape.  But I put on my sneakers, turn on that treadmill, and keep moving.  Sometimes I move slow (6.0mph) and sometimes I move fast. (7.0mph) Sometimes I revert to a speed workout (30 on, 30 off) and sometimes I try to run the whole way through. Nothing is working, but every day I can go a little bit longer without that Please-God-Let-Me-Break-My-Leg-So-I-Can-Stop-Running feeling.  I'm drinking a lot of water and no soda.  I'm eating a lot better than I was before. I know these are helping, but I can't wait until I'm back where I was pre-accident. Get ready!  Here I come! 

Reflections on my Nineteenth Year

It was my sister's 19th birthday yesterday. That obviously led me to hours of disbelief that she was indeed that old. I remember teaching her to drive, arguing that makeup does make your face look different, and babysitting her. Then I remembered that I didn't teach her to drive as much as force her into the driver's seat in a snowstorm and tell her that if she didn't drive, we would never get home. I was the one who didn't wear makeup and "babysitting" meant carrying her upstairs by her underwear, giving her the most extreme wedgie in the entire world. Sorry, Ems! Here is the fabulous birthday girl and me!

As I was writing her birthday card, I tried to remember what I was feeling when I was 19. I was about to start my second year at UConn and I was excited to live with two of my best friends from my first year.

I look back on pictures like this and see how young we are. It makes me think that in 5 years, my sister might look as old as I am now. Eek! Anyway, through more reflection on my 19th year, I decided that instead of telling her how much she means to me, (which I do quite frequently) I would give her 19 piecse of advice for her 19th year! Admittedly, I licked the card shut before writing them down, so these little nuggets are slightly different from the ones in Em's card. Enjoy!

1. Take every opportunity as it comes. Study abroad and join clubs! You'll never have as much freedom as you do now!
2. Travel! You have the chance to study abroad, go on a domestic study away, National Student Exchange, alternative spring break, road trip! Take it now because working 8-5 does not aid in traveling places.
3. Keep in touch with those friends who have been there for you for years. It doesn't seem that important now, but when you really need them, they'll be the first ones on a plane for you.
4.Break the rules. Do something spontaneous. Do something just because you WANT TO!
5. Read the Classics. You have time now and there is something to be said for being well-read.
6. Take photos! Right now, you may not need them; as time goes one, people leave or pass away. You're going to want those photos.
7. Say thank you.
8. Remember people's birthdays and anniversaries. They'll remember yours.
9. Start running now. It's easier to train for a race when you're 19 than 24. Oof.
10. Laugh a lot! Do silly things. Order pizza at 1am just because you can.
11. Meet new people! I met two of my best friends at UConn and I still love them!
12. Try new things. Join clubs and talk to people with whom you think you have nothing in common.
13. Experiment. Eat different foods, dye your hair, use an accent. It's fun!
14. Keep up with technology. Things are only going to get faster.
15. Be grateful. Life is so short and we've been given so much.
16. Write letters, send cards, call people. These will never be replaced by text messages or Facebool chat.
17. Do more than you think you can. You're the only one holding you back.
18. You're stronger than you think you are. Humans are resilient. You can do it!
19. Have fun! You'll never be 19 again!

"Running on the Wall"

Ever since I was a little kid, I had a "special box."  The special box held important things: medals, certificates, touching letters, photos of friends.  As I've gotten older, my special box holds less school related things and more mementos.  Looking through my box from college, you'll find ticket stubs, playbills, cards from those now gone, and the occasional assignment.  I always say that I plan on scrapbooking things from my special box, but there are certain things that are ruined when you glue them down.  I'm always worried I won't be able to hold something in my hand or see an important piece.  Finally, with the wisdom that comes with life experiences and the invention of Pinterest, I've found something that replaces the special box, but still allows for constant revisiting. 

An Etsy seller, Running on the Wall, has created this awesome displays for medals and race bibs.  Mine are all stuck in my special box, wrinkled and sad.  This is a great way to show them off without looking crazy.  The link can be found here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/runningonthewall?ref=seller_info# I love that I can now be aware of such creative and wonderful ideas!

Switching Gears- Race to the Half!

A lot has happened since February and I'm going to switch gears with my blog now. I'm not yet ready to get into all that, but as a result, I've made quite a few life changes. I've signed up for my first half marathon - The Disney Princess Half Marathon in February! I haven't ran competitively in weeks, but I'm really looking forward to training again. Here are some photos from past races!

  I've been reading other running blogs to get inspiration and I foung this gem! http://www.lululemon.com/community/blog/13-1-songs-for-13-1-miles/
   I really loved the 13.1 songs for 13.1 miles. Obviously I'm going to need over 2 hours of songs for my pace, but I really liked these 13. I hope other people like them too!


13.1 songs for 13.1 miles
 1. Dog Days Are Over – Florence and The Machine
2. So Close – Calvin Harris
3. My Body – Young the Giant
4. Run The World – Beyonce
5. Black Betty – Ram Jam
6. Midnight city – M83
7. Work Hard Play Hard – Wiz Khalifa
8. Promises – Skrillex
9. Let it Go – Dragonette
10. Let it Roll – Flo Rida
11. Run This Town – Jay Z Ft. Rihanna
12. Edge of Glory – Lady Gaga
13. Bombs Over Baghdad – Outkast
13.1 Run Forrest Run Remix …Seriously? Who comes up with this stuff!

True story - 13.1 songs will not be enough to get ya through 13.1 miles. Fear not, we’ve purposely built in time for you to unplug and take in the full SeaWheeze experience. We're with Aerosmith on this one... you won't want to miss a thing!

Meat Free for 43 (plus 3!)

Today being Ash Wednesday, I've had a lot of time to think about what I wanted to give up for 46 days. My sister and I decided we would give up meat. This came for a few reasons:
1.) I'm down 18 pounds, but have 8 to go.
2.) I'd like to take more time preparing my own food and this will force me to.
3.) This is going to be HARD: really, really hard. Isn't that what Lent is all about?


Obviously, as I munched on my chick'n fingers and almonds, I'm already dreaming about hot dogs and tacos and fried chicken. I know I can do this, and by the time the 43 (plus 3!) days are over, I'm going to be accustomed to eating like this. However, it gave rise to the idea of creating a list of my favorite foods and restaurants. Here it is!

1.) Best Tex-Mex: Bandito's

Bandito's is the very first place I ate when I was in Dallas. It felt like home (and who can resist giant margaritas?) In addition to fabulous service, great people-watching, and delicious fares, I can't explain how many great times I had there in the summer of 2010. Katie, Janet, Amy, and I would go there as an escape from the work day, before movies or other outings, or just to unwind. Bandito's holds a place in my heart.

Best Burger: Ted's Steamed Cheeseburger

It seems that steamed cheeseburgers are a Connecticut thing. The burgers are steamed in little boxes rather than grilled or fried. This leaves the burgers juicy and wonderful without being oily or flat. Ted's has the best. The rolls are always soft and delicious, the cheese is perfect. A must-try if you're in the Connecticut area!

Best Asian: Sydney's Chinatown

They should really call this "Asiantown." There is such a huge variety of resturants from so many different countries. All of the resturants have patios that open into the stone walkway through Chinatown. The smells mix together, as do the languages. It's really a cultural experience, and the best darn asian food I've ever had.

Best Pizza: Koronet Pizza, NYC

Koronet is in NYC near Columbia University. Not only is the price right, but the slices are HUGE. (see the photo!) I'm a big fan of thin pizza with a crispy crust; this is it! Also, you can't go wrong with the dive-y atmosphere.

Best Dive Bar: Eli Cannon's, Middletown, CT

Sorry, all. I had to go Middletown on this one. Eli Cannon's is my favorite bar (and wing place) in CT! The clientel is always different, the beer (cider) is cold, and the wings are hot!hot!hot! (You can get them in tons of flavors, and even buy the sauces to take home with you.) This is one of those places in Middletown where the locals mix with the Wesleyan crowd. If you're looking for a place to relax without pressure, this is your place. Also, who doesn't love a bar where you can just as easily go in sweat pants as you can in suit?

LH Get Psyched Mix

One of my favorite episodes of HIMYM is The Limo,(2005) in which Barney introduces his Get Psyched Mix.

"Now people think a good mix should rise and fall. But people are wrong. It should be all rise, baby! Now prepare yourselves for an audio journey to the white, hot center of adrenaline!"

I have Barney's Get Psyched Mix and listen to it when I actually need to get psyched. However, I've been listening to my Pandora Abracadabra station for 7.5 hours a day. (Abracadabra by the Steve Miller Band: you'll love it!) I mean, you have to have some sort of inspiration when looking at spreadsheets and merging data all day. I've decided these awesome songs are my Get Psyched Mix! I've decided to share so anyone can recreate the musical joy I have.

You'll notice the playlist is comprised of 80s classic rock and 90s alternative rock with a sprinkling of 80s hard rock. Enjoy!

Highway To Hell by AC/DC
It's Still Rock And Roll To Me by Billy Joel
Jumper by Third Eye Blind
Your Song by Elton John
Santeria by Sublime
Another Brick In The Wall, Part 2 by Pink Floyd
My Own Worst Enemy by Lit
Breakfast At Tiffany's by Deep Blue Something
It's All Been Done by Barenaked Ladies
Snow (Hey Oh) by Red Hot Chili Peppers
Proud Mary by Creedence Clearwater Revival
American Pie - New Version by Don McLean
Accidentally In Love by Counting Crows
Dirty Laundry by Don Henley
Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls
In The Air Tonight (Live) by Phil Collins
Obsession by Animotion
Every Little Thing She Does Is magic by The Police
Your Love by The Outfield
Long Cool Woman by The Hollies
Old Time Rock And Roll (Live) by Bob Seger
Semi-Charmed Life by Third Eye Blind
Free Fallin' by Tom Petty
Rebell Yell by Billy Idol
What's Your Name by Lynyrd Skynyrd
You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC
Peace Of Mind by Boston
How's It Going To Be by Third Eye Blind
If You're Gone by Matchbox Twenty
You Really Got Me by Van Halen
American Pie by Don McLean
Inside Out by Eve 6
In The Air Tonight by Phil Collins
Born To Be Wild by Steppenwolf
I'm A Believer by Smash Mouth
Take On Me by A-Ha
Jungle Love by Steve Miller Band
Rock You Like A Hurricane by Scorpions
Hungry Like The Wolf by Duran Duran
Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins


Clearly, I love all things 80s. :)

A Year in Review

Happy Thanksgiving! At a time that reminds us so much of family, friends, and good fortune, it seems normal that I would reflect on my life last year. Everything I expected would be has long been since turned upside down. There were milestones I haven't reached and I've met goals I didn't even have last year. If I had put together a list last year of everything I wanted, I woulnd't have half of them. That isn't bothering me. Along with my life changes has come a huge shift in priorities.

Last Thanksgiving day, I rushed from the MHS-Xavier football game to Hatfield Thanksgiving to second Thanksgiving. This year, I spent the entire day at home. Emily is a first-year student in college, and therefore didn't dance at the football game. That, in itself, is a huge change for me. It's weird that after five years, I'm living at home and Em is at college. I never expected to be here.

Emily with Bryant's mascot, Tupper

Last year, I was 218 pounds heavier. Eighteen of those pounds were on my hips and thighs, and 200 was on my back, weighing me down. At the time, I didn't know how heavily the doomed relationship was weighing on me. It affected every day of my life and I feel so much freer now. Nine months have passed and I can clearly see my path. I need time to figure out myself and why I was so reluctatnt to let go of something so toxic. Sometimes I think I've got everything figured out, and then others I feel I'm doomed to repeat my mistakes over and over again. I do know that I won't ever make them with him again.

The new Lauren!

My main reflection from the last year is to live here in the moment. You never know when you'll be single, unemployed, living with your parents. Relish your friendships and the fun while you're having it. Look around at the people who are by your sides; these are your true soul mates. I can count on one hand the non-family people who really, truely care about me. I'm planning to look back on Thanksgiving 2011-Thanksgiving 2012 and be able to say that I've nutured those people who love me and have made the most of the gifts I've been given.

xoxo